As I walked through the double doors, a long line met me within two feet of my entrance. 'Great, another wasted half an hour of my life, waiting.' I was trying to not grumble to myself as I joined sixteen other people, standing in a silent line, in a fairly silent room. I stood there wondering why they don't play some music or something, as all these stoic people stood before me, and I thought wow, it was going to be a long wait as I scanned the faces and wondered why everyone looked so grouchy! Suddenly, the silence was broken by an older man yelling curse words off to the left side of the line. About the same time as the cursing started, a lady joined the line, two people behind me. She was having a very loud cell phone conversation, apparently oblivious to the sign that she passed that said NO CELL PHONES, and to the fact that the room was filled with other people. Not that I'm an eavesdropper, but it was difficult to avoid hearing her conversation because she was very loud. My attention shifted, however, as the door to the backroom opened, and a very serious, properly dressed woman came through the door to the upset man. However, things shifted back as the lady behind me says quite loud, 'well, I mean it's up to you what you do honey, but if you really want to keep him in your life, then I would say you better move in with him and give him what he wants, even if it's not what you want to do, you need a man in your life and you need to give in to his needs. I mean, you think he's okay, so just move in with him and fulfill his manly needs and at least you will be taken care of.' I see many of the heads in the line ahead of me twitch to the side, but no one turned completely around. One lady pretended to cough in her shoulder, just to get a glance back. I can see others are trying to 'itch' their backs, or nonchalantly scan the ceiling, down to the windows, and very slowly, to the back of the line. In the meantime, the lady who appeared through the locked door from the back room is trying to calm the man who is cursing down, however, it's not working. He is yelling that the machine took his money, and he wants it back. Many of the eyes are now slowly turning to the left side, but this scene is interrupted when, once again, the door to the back room is opened, and a very large box filled with holes comes through the door with another gal telling a man, 'well, I believe it's alive. I heard something in their scratching, so I would guess it's still alive.' The politeness of everyone in line seemed to disappear with that comment, and every eye in the place was on this box. The lady behind me is still rattling away, but I don't think any of us heard what she said as we were all fixated on the box that read "LIVE" in large letters. The box was taken to a man waiting patiently by a counter, and he was told to open it to make sure it was alive. Now, every eye had shifted to the right side of the room. The smell that came out of that box when he opened it would have led me to believe it was NOT alive, as a horrible stench filled the room, but the man said it was alive. Apparently, it was a large bird of some kind, but as the older man started to drop some not so nice words, again, I lost track of the bird in the box. The lady dealing with this man, told him she did not have a key and could not give him his money back but she would give him a voucher and he could get in line and they would give him back his FIFTY CENTS! This did not make the man happy and he got even louder, telling her that the point of using the machine was so he did not have to stand in the stupid line, which by now was at the door. She says 'yes sir, I know this line is very long, however this is the only thing we can do.' The words that came out of his mouth were quite rude, but the lady on the phone seemed to think it was a competition to out speak this man, and she just got louder. By this time, I'm finding myself trying not to laugh out loud because it's all hitting me as quite amusing. Inside, I am cracking up, but thought I better keep it inside so that I don't become the next spectacle in the room. I mean, I'm sure if all the sudden I started cracking up laughing in the middle of the room, people would probably turn around and stare at me, even though they hadn't been staring at the other people. I did laugh all the way to my car, and for a good five minutes after leaving. Wow, and here I thought that going to the post office with a bulk mailer would be boring! I guess I'm just easily amused.
"Carry laughter with you wherever you go." ~Hugh Sidey
"A cheerful heart is good medicine." ~Proverbs 17:22
6 comments:
That is a very funny story!
I loved this so much, I hope you won't mind if I put a link to it for my Friday Favorites.
No, that is fine Kathy. Hehe
GREAT post. It made me shake my head in disbelief in some points hi hi hi...especially when reading the woman on the phone who gave such advice to her friend. Unbelievable!!!
I came over from Kathy's recommendation! I enjoyed reading! Thanks :)
I'm via Kathy, too. How hilarious! And I thought the only reason to go to the post office was to mail things!
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